So...

I joined Jazzercise (yes, you read that right, Jazzercise) as part of my "Getting Fit" campaign.

My friend told me I looked like a marionette with my long arms and legs flailing aimlessly around the room.

I am scared to think what the other fifty women thought.

A confusing path to success

My overwhelming obsession with Sharpies also extends to an obsession with using them. Using them to make lists. Only minimal amounts of work would get done if I don't make a list each day. But the list can't be just any list on any kind of paper with any kind of pen. It must be a neat, clean sheet of paper the same as yesterday's and written with the Sharpie color of the day. Some days may have the same Sharpie color as the day prior, this depends on my mood. The text is also of the utmost importance. I had tried using the PocketMod for a while, but NOPE it was too bulky, the lines were too thick and that made my writing feel too cluttered. The list must be perfectly spaced with a perfectly aligned left edge, if it isn't I start over. If a line runs too long, that's it, new list.

I have to make lists everyday because I could so easily find a million other things to do besides work. Things like petting the dogs, sitting in the sun or taking photographs could, and very often do, distract me from sitting down and actually working. This is where the neat, orderly insanity makes all the difference. I am just better at being distracted and that's why the overly systematic list works in my favor. My head fills up with all the things I should be doing and then opts out of all of them. But, if I make a perfectly aligned, tidy list it speaks to me in only ways I can hear. "HEY! YOU! Sit down! Make money! Then...buy shoes!"

When I hear that I sit down and work.

Summer is here

There's only two seasons here in Southern California, warm and warmer. Warm starts in mid-October and lasts through mid-March. Warmer lasts the other seven to eight months of the year. I didn't realize it was warmer season already, but what do you know, I have my first sunburn! It was 78 and perfect in Santa Monica yesterday.

Because there's nothing else worth watching on television these days

I had never been interested in watching the show Dog Whisperer. The name alone puts me off. We had heard both good and bad things about the show in the course of the last few years, and never we never really cared enough to investigate it ourselves. Recently we started watching a few episodes here and there, and now it's our favorite work-from-home lunch hour entertainment. We're totally sucked in. We like how Cesar commands the dogs just with his presence, not his voice or having them sit and stay. The dogs know he is in charge. Henry and Lola know we're in charge but only about 85% of the time. They are good dogs but we'd really like them to be great, perfect, not lunging at small children dogs. They understand not to eat our shoes, sleep on the sofa, steal food off the kitchen counter or bark at the garbageman. They do not understand how not to excitedly leap head-high when people come to visit, walk calmly on a leash or bark at the neighborhood children riding their bicycles. We really want them to be more relaxed and less worried about what is going on around them. Cesar says that to make that happen we need a dominant pack leader emoting a calm-assertive energy. That in stressful situations if the pack leader is calm the dogs will eventually learn to be calm, they become calm-submissive.

Thomas speaking to the dogs: "Do you like having me as your pack leader?"

Me to Thomas: "WHAT?!"

Thomas: "I am clearly the dominant male."

Me: "And that matters, why? I am clearly in charge around here. I am the dominant pack leader."

Thomas: "I am the dominant one."

Me: "I am the dominant one. I do most of the feeding, walking and caring for these dogs. They know I am in charge."

Thomas with his knee on my back pinning me to the floor: "Say, 'I'm the dominant one.'"

Me: "I am the dominant one."

Me again after incessant tickling while still pinned and immobile: "Don't you feel that two people in a loving marriage should really face this together rather than one being dominant over the other?"

Thomas releasing me: "Yes, but then you can't claim you're the dominant one!"

So from this example we can see that I displayed calm-assertive energy and male-mind-boggling marriage rationale to overcome this heightened situation. And as thought before, I am the dominant one!

The weather is perfect again today

I really didn't walk much at all this week. The weather was lousy and if you've ever known anyone that lives in Southern California you know that if it is not 70 and sunny they suffer from severe Seasonal Affective Disorder, also known as SAD. When it rains they are completely useless, not able to drive, throwing themselves off the highest building and just generally moping around unable to perform any task because their brains shut down at the first sight of a daunting cloud.

It rained all week and all weekend. It was so depressing even the dogs slept in until noon yesterday.

: :: ::: :: :

Week 5
Walking: 1.3 miles
(really pathetic)